Congratulations! You woke up this morning. That’s reason to celebrate. And that’s only one good thing about today. Many others await. Working in the corporate world, I’ve noticed an epidemic of people living for the weekends. Admittedly, I’ve even fallen into that mindset at times. But it’s something I never wanted to do. I try to make it a point to celebrate each day in light of itself rather than with Friday in mind. Every day is a unique gift, waiting to be unwrapped. What will I find when I untie the ribbon? What mystery will unfold when I peel back the wrapping paper? Sure, work can be challenging, demanding, and overwhelming sometimes. But it can also be fun, exciting, and productive. A lot of it depends on our attitudes. If I go to work expecting it to be a tough day, I’m likely to encounter more challenges than if I arrive at work ready to conquer my tasks and be victorious. And in the latter scenario, I’m more apt to have fun along the way, too. Regardless of my outlook on life a particular day, people are watching me. They’re watching you, too, to see how you react, how you handle the happenings of the day. You have more influence than you realize. Each day gives us a new chance to make a difference in the lives of those around us. We can influence others for good or for bad. As you carefully open the package of today, I hope you find reason to celebrate. It will be easier if you’re looking to find good. After all, tomorrow isn’t guaranteed.
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I had the best of intentions. I aimed to get to that project I learned about two months ago. I didn’t mean to let my friend down. But in reality, I had. Has that ever happened to you? I kept chipping away at my to-do list and finally got around to what my friend had asked me to do. But why did it take so long? What kept me from making it a higher priority? And what if I hadn’t gotten to it even still? We all have good intentions. You’ve likely heard the proverb, “The road to Hell is paved with good intentions,” which summarizes the dilemma. The truth is we judge ourselves by our intentions, but we judge others by their actions. It’s a double standard, and it’s not fair. Think about the last time you had to wait for someone to do something for you or to get back to you about a matter. How did that waiting period feel? Wasn’t it frustrating to know that your priority wasn’t your friend’s? How do we remedy that? The best solution is to take the Golden Rule to heart: Treat others the way you want to be treated. If we want to be a priority in the lives of others, then we have to make them a priority in ours. As with many things, it’s easier said than done. It would probably also help to have the same standard for ourselves that we have for others. A lot of times, that’s not the case. The grace we judge ourselves with should be extended to those around us. And we need to know our limits. If we’re steadily busy with extracurricular activities, we don’t do our friends any favors when we say we can help with their requests — but know we can’t really get to them in a timely fashion. We need to be willing to say no in those cases. No, we don’t like to let friends down, but our honesty actually helps them and avoids disappointing them. If they know we’re too busy to help with a certain project, that frees them to seek help from someone else. Contrary to popular belief, the thought doesn’t really count. It’s the follow-through that matters. What can you accomplish today that you’ve been meaning to get to for a while? You might also like:
5 Ways to Be Happy With Your Life Right Now Getting Back on Track Willingness to Ask I’ve had the privilege of taking some professional development classes lately, and one of the exercises my colleagues and I were asked to do was to “find our why.” We had to do some deep thinking to figure out what makes us tick, what makes us get out of bed in the morning. We went through a number of activities to get our brain juices flowing in an effort to narrow in on that unique thing for each of us. We answered questions such as “What are your values?” “What makes you unique?” “When are you at your best?” “Why is that so great?” “When have you failed?” And “What would your family and friends say about you?” This called for some deep soul searching. And after a few days of contemplation, I thought I had it all figured out. With a confident sense of accomplishment, I decided my “why” is to encourage and inspire the lives I come in contact with. What a relief! I finally knew exactly what it was that drove me. Or so I thought. With the idea of encouraging and inspiring those I come in contact with in mind, I found myself not doing that around every single person I encountered. And that took me through another round of introspection. Could my why really center on encouraging and inspiring others if I didn’t do it all the time — and it wasn’t the first thing I went to when confronted with a life? After all, I’m more of a task person than a people person. I decided that must not be my why. And I thought long and hard about that. Suddenly, a light bulb illuminated in my head. I realized my why, the true reason I get out of bed in the morning, is to celebrate life. And I beamed. This was definitely it. This IS it. God has given me a second chance at life after battling breast cancer in the face of losing both of my sisters to the disease. Every day I get up is a gift. And I want to celebrate that gift. How about you? What’s your why? Sometimes I get so busy that it seems my life is controlling me instead of the other way around. When that happens, I have to stop and take a step back, evaluate how I got to that point, and make some changes to bring balance into my life. I’ve been in a bit of a funk as of late, brought on by a number of factors. And I found myself feeling ho-hum. I assessed the causes, but that wasn’t enough to pull me out. I had to take determined steps to look past my doldrums and get back to enjoying life. And in doing so, I came up with five ways to be happy with my life right now. They may seem like commonsense, but I know from experience, there’s real truth here. 1. Make yourself a priority. That doesn’t mean you need to be self-centered or conceited. It just means you need to be sure you don’t slough off things you enjoy. If you like to read, make time to fit that into your daily life. If you enjoy watching movies or spending time with friends, or whatever it may be, don’t let that slip for more than a day. You need that activity to recharge your batteries and keep going. 2. Exercise. Fitting fitness into your busy schedule is imperative if you want to have a healthy outlook on life. It doesn’t have to be the same exercise every day, but make sure you get up and move. Set a goal and reach for it. Maybe you want to walk 6,000 steps a day, go to the gym three times a week, walk the dog, you get the idea. Sticking with that goal is important to your livelihood. 3. Eat good foods. Sure, you could take that to mean, “Eat foods you consider good.” But in reality, you need to eat foods with high nutritional value. Many of us are emotional eaters, and our go-to food soothers tend not to be too healthy. Opt for lots of fruits, veggies, and whole grains instead — and you’ll be surprised at how those healthier choices improve your attitude. 4. Get enough sleep. Various studies say you need a certain amount of hours of sleep each night. You know your body and what it operates best on. Try to get that amount. I tend to operate best with about eight hours of sleep, but most nights I get six. As long as I don’t go below six, I’m usually pretty good. Tiredness is the antithesis of a clear mind, and you can’t afford to be foggy if you don’t want to fall into a funk. 5. Do something for others. To really get out of my gloom, I had to get my focus off myself and onto helping those around me. When I busy myself with aiding someone in need or helping to better someone’s life, I can’t think about myself and my problems. And you know what? When that happens, suddenly my issues don’t seem as big as they once did. I didn’t mean for three weeks to go by without blogging. Life just got in the way. But in reality, I made other things priorities, and my blog took a back seat. And you know what? I lost my joy. I’ve been rather blah lately — and stressed. Life doesn’t have the same pizzazz as usual. And when I stopped being busy long enough to analyze that, I realized it’s because I haven’t been following my passion. I got derailed by distractions. Writing gets me jazzed. I feel accomplished and invigorated when my thoughts flow through my fingers onto my computer screen or paper. It brightens my day and gives me a happy outlook on life. I could blather about all of the reasons I haven’t written since the end of January, but they would just be excuses. And I don’t like drama. I’ve had my fair share of it these past three weeks, but I still don’t like it. And I certainly don’t want to bore you with the details. Suffice it to say I took my eyes off the prize, lost my drive, and now I’m bouncing back. I read an article recently that I found quite enlightening. It talked about the importance of saying something isn’t a priority instead of saying, “I’m too busy.” There’s a lot of truth in that. I’ve been quite busy as of late, but in reality, my priorities got out of whack. And I lost sight of what makes me tick and of taking care of me. I stopped going for walks during my lunch break, even though the weather’s been beautiful in the Phoenix area, and I’ve been feeling bogged down by the long list of things I know I need to accomplish. Some people are good at relaxing. I’m not one of them. I am a doer and, as such, I have trouble relaxing until all of my work is done. If I know a task needs to be accomplished, I do it. (The fact that I easily fall asleep when I relax plays a part, too.) At any rate, I came to realize that life got in the way of my enjoyment of life. So I’ve decided to do something about it. I’m choosing to make those things that bring me joy higher priorities in my life, to help me get past the blahs and to get back on track. How about you? What distractions have derailed you? And what steps are you going to take to get back on track? The truth is, if we don’t take care of ourselves, we’re no good to anyone around us. I feel a smile forming on my face as I write this, knowing that I’m finally getting back to what matters most. I wish for you to be able to do the same. At a doctor’s office recently, a sign at the reception desk made me smile. It said, “Thank you for being you — you’re awesome!” The receptionist knew there was more to her life than taking patients’ money and prepping them to meet their doctors. That sign said a lot about that woman’s character. Without ever meeting her or knowing anything else about her, I was well aware she was a caring individual. Why? Because she took a few seconds to handwrite that note and post it on the window that separated her from incoming patients. She knew those few words could make a difference in someone’s day — and life. That’s how it is for all of us. Our character says a lot about us, and people are watching, whether we think so or not. What kind of vibe are you giving off? What can people tell about you upon first encounter? “Thank you for being you — you’re awesome!" I hope when people cross my path for the first time, they can tell I, too, care about people and that I like being happy and making others happy. I hope whatever brief encounter we share is a positive one. I know that’s not always the case. I’m human and have my bad days, just like everyone else. Some days, traffic really gets to me, and on those days, it’s easy for me to give the wrong impression. But overall, I like to think I add value to the lives of those around me. There’s enough negativity in this world; no one needs more of it from me. But more importantly, I see life as a gift, and I want to make the most of it. What about you? What does your character say about you? If you don’t like the answer, only you can change it. You wouldn’t necessarily expect to find a greeting card company with a prominent display at a show dedicated to consumer electronics — unless it was showcasing a new electronic gadget, such as a drone, to accompany its cards. But that’s exactly what American Greetings did at CES (Consumer Electronics Show) this year: It had a huge enclosed booth promoting nothing other than paper, with a marketing campaign slogan of “a device like no other.” The main selling points? Greeting cards don’t need charging or electricity. They don’t require batteries. They don’t involve a learning curve. And they’re not outrageously priced. Despite the rapid rise of technology — and the lack of technology in physical greeting cards — people buy 6.5 billion greeting cards per year, according to the Greeting Card Association. Something about these communication devices keeps us coming back. Back to basics Another interesting thing of note at CES was a device called Freewrite. It’s essentially an old-school typewriter or word processor that simply saves what you write (type) in the cloud. The selling points for this? No Facebook, YouTube, or similar technologies to distract you from the task at hand. I don’t know that FreeWrite will take off, but I can see it being beneficial to writers who get easily sidetracked. What really stands out to me in both of these “technologies” is a desire for authenticity and simplicity. We’re constantly inundated with information and distractions. There’s too much vying for our attention. FreeWrite offers a seeming escape from that, taking writers back to the basics. And greeting cards provide a breath of fresh air. The thought that someone would stop his or her busyness, sit down, and take the time to jot a personal note to you can really make your day. Yet, in reality, it doesn’t take that much extra time. What does that say? In just a few minutes a day, we can have a huge impact simply by being authentic with one another. That strikes a chord with people. That’s a message businesses should take to heart, too. Simple is better. How will you be authentic today? I don’t like New Year’s resolutions. I learned a long time ago that they’re easy to make but hard to keep. Say you make a resolution to give up chocolate for a year. The first few days, weeks, maybe even months are easy. But then you think, “What am I trying to prove?” And “Who will care if I do eat chocolate?” So you partake of the delicacy, and your New Year’s resolution is out the window. Once you break a resolution, it’s over. Your resolution failed. Fitness centers know this truth only too well. Every January, membership increases as people realize they ate too much over the holidays and set out to do something about it in the new year. But by the end of February, the majority of those new members stop attending. Their motivation for life change wanes. Maybe they missed a day or two of going to the gym. The promise of meeting their New Year’s resolutions quickly dissipates. I stopped making resolutions because of too many experiences like that. But I still believe the dawning of a new year is a good time to reflect on the previous one and put realistic, attainable plans in place. So these days, instead of making New Year’s resolutions, I set goals. Whereas a resolution is dashed once broken, a goal is more achievable. You might fail along the way, but you just pick yourself up and try again. The goal remains in sight. For example, if you want to get healthier and stronger in 2017, you might make a goal to that effect — and that would be more attainable than committing to going to the gym five days a week for 50 weeks of the year. See the difference? As I ruminate 2016, I smile at my accomplishments. It was a good year. And I look ahead to making 2017 even better. Has the busyness of life and the complexity of technology got you stressed? Relax. Rather than feeling overwhelmed, underqualified and worn out, just laugh. There’s nothing like a good belly laugh that makes your cheeks hurt and leaves you breathless. I can’t predict when that will happen, but sometimes I just get carried away with laughing — to the point that I can’t stop. And that’s not a bad thing. I saw a quote by Doug Hall recently that says, “You can increase your brain power three- to fivefold simply by laughing and having fun before working on a problem.” That got my attention because I love to laugh. The act of laughing changes brainwave activity, improving short-term memory. It also releases feel-good endorphins that give your brain an overall sense of pleasure. And it’s contagious and builds connections between people. I know some of my best memories have laughter at their core. The best part is if I was stressed before a laughing attack, I’m not after. Laughter is an ideal stress release — and it’s free. Laughter has a lot of other health benefits, too. According to the Mayo Clinic, It boosts your immune system, naturally relieves pain and increases happiness. If you’re feeling down, find something to laugh about; it will lighten your load. So what are you waiting for? Go ahead and laugh. You have nothing to lose. Our words don’t take much effort to say, but they can have a lasting impact. On a recent run, I approached an older man who was jogging. I smiled at his efforts, impressed at him for getting out and exercising his body. He wasn’t going all that fast, but he was running nonetheless. It took effort, discipline, and willpower. I didn’t say anything as I neared the man for fear of startling him. But as I passed, he uttered three words to me, “Way to go!” I turned my head to look at him, smiled and said, “You too,” and gave him an enthusiastic thumbs up. And then I continued on my way. Our encounter took only seconds. I don’t know which way the man went. On my way home when I returned to the point I had seen him, he was nowhere to be found. But his words stayed with me. He had spared some energy and voiced them willingly, wanting to encourage a stranger passing by. How often in life do we have an opportunity to do the same? It doesn’t take much time, thought, or effort, but our words can make someone’s day. A compliment on a piece of clothing you like. Acknowledgment that you appreciate someone’s smile. A greeting when you come in contact with someone. A common meme says, “Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be kind. Always.” I’d say the jogging man certainly exhibited that kindness. And he made me want to do the same. |
Lana GatesChristian, wife, mother of 5, breast cancer survivor, marathon finisher, writer and editor, author of "Help! I'm a Science Project" Archives
November 2018
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